I have rescued for your entertainment and mine some of the nonsense I wrote back then, this, the first I found to post but not first article, was most definitely triggered by some of the people I played against. I didn't just imagine all these traits.
Lucky Dice? – B****y Dice!
Many things can influence a player’s success on the field
of battle:
- The way he places his forces on the table, in relation
to the enemy’s units.
- His use of cover and terrain to its best advantage.
- His placement of units so they support
each other, giving covering fire etc.
As everybody
knows all games demonstrate the player’s skills and have nothing to do with
luck.
The fact that
the opposing general has had an appalling sequence of dice throws and therefore
loses in no way detracts from the winner’s skilled play and disposition of his
forces.
The cry of, ‘He had all the
luck, his dice throws always give him what he need,’ should be ignored. The
loser’s dice rolls were probably just as lucky or unlucky as the winner’s. The
winner ‘merely’ managed his luck ill or good better than you did! Remember
Napoleon is reported to have said, that he only wanted Generals who were lucky.
However in truth a lucky general is one who has planed ahead and is prepared to
take advantage of his luck and arranged his forces to limit the damage in the
event of bad luck.
Rubbish this
only applies when you are winning!
Everybody
knows it was the role of the dice that made you lose, a one or six at the
crucial point would have made all the difference in the world. If you had had
his luck and he your ill fortune, naturally you would have won.
In gaming the roll of dice can
really can influence a game, especially if you’re the sort of player whose
tactic is to rely on the throw of the dice. As a result of the fickle offerings
of lady luck many of us have developed techniques or quirks that improve our
luck. Some of these are listed below, you may recognise them, I trust you don’t
use all of them!
I dropped it! A player picks up his dice and ‘accidentally’ drops one or more
of them. If they fall correctly he calmly rolls the rest in such away that it
appears to be a single roll. If they fall badly, he calls out, ‘I dropped
that’, picks them up and rolls again.
Oops, sorry! His dice roll scatters into your unit knocking them back, as
he generously stands your men back up, he place them within assault range of
his troops. Where he was rolling armour saves then naturally they will now be
out of range and you will be unable to assault him!
Scatter roll. The player rolls his dice in such a way they collide with
dice resting on the table. Any sixes within the scatter range can be claimed as
rolled that turn. If there are none he can claim that the collision of dice
affected the outcome or that he can’t tell which are his dice and re-roll all
his dice. (The collision claim is also useable in Oops, Sorry!)
Jelly drop. The dice are picked up in such away that if skilfully
dropped they will not roll, but rather land with the desired number face up.
Heavy dice are ideal for this as is a soft sticky landing pad, jammy bread is
perfect.
Tilt! A
dice that rolls with the correct value face up is not tilted even if the
degrees of tilt exceeds 80o, however if the roll is wrong a tilt of
5oor less, is deemed sufficient to warrant a re-roll. The keener
player will come prepared with a level for this and will argue over a list of
one degree. The correct application of a level is not printable on these
hallowed pages.
Rough ground. A variation of ‘Tilt!’ almost as if it were master crafted! The
rough terrain with its lumps and bumps will offer many more tilting
opportunities; hence more dice will be available for re-roll or not as
required.
Too many. Pick up more dice than allowed and roll them into resting
dice, identify only those with the right result, ignore others. Best used in
conjunction with the ‘Scatter roll’.
How many? When instructed to roll five armour save dice, refuse those
offered by the opponent, (see quirks #1), instead pick up individual dice,
counting slowly, fumble and drop dice and begin counting again, enquire as to
the number of dice e.g. ‘Four wasn’t it?’ then roll the four dice. If they all
save and the opponent doesn’t query continue with the game, if challenged roll
one more. If they fail to save recognise your error e.g. ‘Sorry it was five
wasn’t it?’ then re-roll all five dice.
Quirks.
1.
Never accept dice rolled by an opponent, you don’t want
his aura to affect your roll.
2.
Always hide his lucky dice and use them yourself.
3.
Don’t let him touch your lucky dice reclaim and hide
them immediately.
4.
Pick up sixes when you want to throw a one, conversely
pick up ones and twos when a six is required after all a dice wont roll the
same number twice will it!
5.
Roll dice one at a time, each can then be individually
blessed, blown on or kissed.
Well I hope that all helps and
has perhaps raised a smile.
But please remember this, if
you’re winning and luck is going your way shut up and enjoy. Don’t gloat.
If luck is not going your way,
grin and bear it. Even if there is no way you will win and the game is
pointless, continue to the bitter end. Why?
1.
This may be the first game your opponent has won in a
long time and why shouldn’t the poor sod enjoy full sweet victory. (You’ll want
the favour returned wont you.)
2.
Remember the dice will change, especially if you hide
his lucky ones.
Dranask Wolfsbane
(aka Mark EA Foulds)
8th March 2004
This article was first posted to the in house magazine Insanity in 2004
